Slut for Sparkles

In her Slut era. It's mostly glitter and poor deciscions.

Commit Crimes

Hide your glitter. And your credit card.

Anhedolphins

they leap, they feel nothing

Clinically Majestic

Galloping through rainbows with the weight of your diagnosis? Same.

I Could Jump

Standing on the edge totally for aesthetic purposes only.

Withdrawal Bears

fuckin watch out for tweakums

Meth and Fetamines

well I have been lookin for some meth and fetamines and you look like the type of feller that could tell me where to find both

Handle With Care

if I could only get a handle on my life

jack and friends

I'll never let go jack

I'm the captain now

put some captain in me bro

tequiler

are tequila and aloe cousins

Yes, Queen

She reigns in Red 40 and regret. Her Smirnoff is room temp and doubles as perfume.

Duke Carl, High Warden of Horsepower

Built his ride from spite, lawnmower parts, and a disability claim. Won’t stop until the yard, or his enemies, are mowed.

The Matriarch

First of her name. Mother of meltdown heirs. Built her kingdom between the beef jerky rack and a broken lotto machine.

Sir Dale, Royal Advisor & Keeper of Coupons

Whispers in the ear of kings and keeps track of propane receipts. Known for his wisdom, his clipboard, and a tragic devotion to gas station rotisserie.

The Body Gaurds

Stationed in the royal restroom. They don’t speak. They just watch. One hasn’t blinked since ‘09. The other has a plunger and a past.

Con Per Miso

no not con per miso

Ham Sammich

A perfect ham sammich.

Thank You Shrimpus Christ

I have no idea whats happening here

Midnight Thumper

do people wear fishnets anymore

Ballad of a Hungry Heart

He strums his acoustic and sings a heartfelt song. It’s folksy.

He into You

those finger guns are for you baby

This Is the Part Where You Forget

Split Ends

Mayhaps the tower wasn't the problem

Lines and Tides

id be doin some hot rail too ho if I left my damn eco system and modified by body for a chad

Consent Pending

5 more min bro

Loose Ends

its always the hair why do men do this

Core Memory

Whole Foods After Dark

Domestic Fantasy

slappy slap slap

Heaven’s Littlest Quitter

my kitten soul sister

Dead Inside

Cute Outside